My Book is back for sale

Paul B

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Dexter, I plan to tie that peacock to Humble's golf cart as I know he really likes golf.

Humble, there is a big pond that goes through some of that golf course right behind "your" new house. And last year I threw a huge snapping turtle in there so the fish that die in quarantine, you can throw to him. :p

When I was about 16, I caddied at a really elite golf course near here. I would get $18.00 to carry two bags for 18 holes which lasted me a couple of months then as that was a fortune. Sammy Davis Junior once landed on the tee in a helicopter.

The course here in front of my house some people land on the rough in helicopters. They have a "little" more money than me but I hear they sell quarantined fish. :)
 

Paul B

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I found this from last year. I don't know if I put it on here. But being this is the Lounge, this is where I will put it. A place where very few go anyway and I don't want it in the normal forums as I am to old to argue and will probably just drool:

I am fairly sure I will never start up a new tank. If my tank ever crashed now, I would probably leave the hobby as I have been in it since the 50s and I think that is long enough. My wife and I would do some more traveling and maybe buy another house in the tropics someplace. Maybe open up a resort for retired Supermodels.

But if I ever "had" to set up a tank from scratch maybe because we are being attacked by Vampire Neanderthals from Bayone New Jersey and the only way they would leave you alone is if you set up a new tank, then this is what "I" would do.

If I only had ASW, which is fake seawater I would get that, hopefully on sale and I wouldn't care what brand it was as I don't think it matters. I would also use gravel like crushed coral or like I use now dolomite, but I think that stuff is extinct. 🤪

I personally would also put in a reverse undergravel filter. When you stop laughing I will continue and if your tank is older than mine and you don't use a reverse UG filter, write your own thread and I will go and buy that house in the tropics and read your thread as I am drinking a rum punch while being massaged by an out of work coconut picker.

Put in some rocks, as many as you can afford. If you are near the sea, collect some of those. If you can get live rock, it is better.

I would add a dead shrimp, clam, emu, road kill or any other dead thing. If it's a 100 gallon tank I would add 2 dead shrimp or maybe 3. It doesn't matter as we won't be eating that shrimp. The bacteria will.
I personally would also add a hand full of garden soil with no fertilizer, bug killers, week killers, roach killers, mole killers oil stain remover, STP etc.
If I lived near the sea, I would add about a cup full or two of mud from there. (I would also collect NSW but I am assuming you can't or don't want to.

If you can get NSW but you are afraid of parasites, pesticides, hypodermic needles, pollution etc. You are in the wrong hobby or in NaNa land and should never follow anything I write. :unsure:

The water should get cloudy and maybe even stink. That is fine. Sometimes bacteria stinks. The bacteria will eat the shrimp. They will start to like you, not so much the shrimp.
You can test the water if you have nothing to do but it is not necessary because you are "not" putting in fish now.

After the water clears, throw in another couple of shrimp. The water will clear again. You can keep adding shrimp as the water clears.

Buy a fish, not an Achilles tang, pinecone fish, purple tang or anything expensive, but the cheapest fish you can find. Maybe a clown.

This is opposite what I do in my tank now but this is for a brand new tank with new water, new rock, new bacteria and maybe a new girlfriend.
Take that fish and put it in a separate tank using water from the tank that just cleared with the dead shrimps. Add some copper like it says on the bottle. If you can get it also add some quinicrine hydrocloride (10mg/gal) but if you can't get that or something similar, don't worry about it.

Throw some thing in there for the fish to hide but "not PVC elbows" as fish hate anything new and white. I would break up some new red bricks from Home Depot. If you have old bricks you can use them but not with tar, shoe polish, anthrax etc. on them.

You will need to change some of that water every day along with copper and add water from your main tank. Replace that water with new water.

Stick the fish in there for ten days. No more. Feed it small pieces of clam or better live blackworms. If you can't get that use LRS food.

After ten days put that fish into the main tank. He may get some spots. Leave him there. People on forums will tell you to catch him and treat him for 72 days and leave the tank fallow.
Forget those people and go and watch TV, not Oprah or Dr. Oz. Go for National Geographic.

Any spots should clear up. If not, he will die and you will have try again, but I think he will be fine. That fish is now immune and you can put him in the same tank with a sick leatherback turtle or manatee, but don't.
Change some water as the nitrates are through the roof.

Then get another fish, not a clownfish because the first one will think who he is and may kill the first one. Maybe get a bleeny or gobi.
Do the same thing.

After some time, maybe 4 months don't do that quarantine 10 day thing. Just put new fish in.

The theory is that no new tanks with new water are healthy no matter what you do. Most of those tanks will have problems no matter what you do. Moses, Noah, Jacques Cousteau and a marine biologist with more degrees than a thermometer could help you set up a tank from scratch and you will most likely have problems.

Don't worry about it unless you stupidly started the tank with a $200.00 clown triggerfish which I said not to do.

The ten day "quarantine" period is because that new clown will have parasites as "ALL" fish from the sea have. You don't see them i the store because the fish is in copper or some other parasite medication. The store owner won't tell you that but that fish is not in chicken soup, it is in medication.

When you remove him from medication he will show spots. It is normal and not important as we actually want the fish to have some parasites. The fish will never become immune unless he is infected just like if you never get measles, you are not immune from it.

Unfortunately you need the fish to be in contact with diseases. Sorry people who quarantine this is "my" method. You can write your own method as many people do.

This entire method counts on the fact that a week ago that fish was in the sea, maybe swimming around the feet of Angelina Jolie and her 15 kids. He was eating fresh food at every meal and that food all
"HAD PARASITES" in it. Fish were meant to eat that as I have never seen one in Burger King unless it was on a plate with special sauce or whatever they put on fish as I don't eat there.

That clownfish was immune in the sea as he was swimming and eating parasites his entire life. That ten day copper treatment isn't long enough to remove the fishes immunity but 72 days may. Eventually we have to introduce fish from the sea "with" the parasites and diseases because we actually "want" to have a breeding population of parasites to happily live along with the fish. Remember, no parasites = fish with no immunity.

Now that those fish are immune, buy whatever fish you want. It doesn't matter as long as you followed this and didn't quarantine or medicate too long. That ten days won't kill all parasites. And we don't want it to, we just want that weakened fish from the store to build up some strength to fight them off while he is getting his immunity working.

Now keep feeding those fish something with live bacteria in it like worms or clams.

 

Paul B

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I just remembered a story and the rare times I remember something I want to post them. I know I posted this on here probably near the beginning of last century so if you heard it go and watch "Naked and Afraid".
I think tonight they are hunting newts with spears.

I was in Kings Cross in Sydney Australia on R&R from Nam in 1970 and I just got off the plane. I went on a double decker bus (which I had never seen before) and I went to the top and looked out the front window. I turned around and saw that there were mainly girls on the bus (in those days everyone was in the war) They all had mini skirts on which was new to me because I just spent 10 months in the jungle and when I got drafted not many girls wore them. All I saw in those ten months was monkeys, and some of them were starting to look good. Anyway, that doesn't matter. Well, to me it did. I saw this pretty girl in the front of the bus and she smiled so I sat down next to her. I would have sat next to her even if she threw a flounder and tire iron at me, but whatever.
:p

She is for another story (which I also posted on here someplace. ) Anyway she gave me directions to my hotel even though I had a map. I was on this busy intersection trying to figure out where I was and these two guys older come up to me. One guy says something to me that sounded like "Hey Chap, woud, you % mind if & yu heped, guy $ street ##. Or something like that. I said "What!? He said it again a little slower. I could barely make out that he wanted me to help this blind guy across the street. (You Aussies speak funny) So I took the guys arm and I am standing there waiting for the light to turn green.

After a while I noticed that there was no light. No YIELD, no STOP, no CAUTION, no NOTHING. The cars were zooming all over the place with no spaces in between for me to cross, especially with a blind guy.
:confused:


So the guy mutters to me, "Whats the matter Chap?" I said, How do you cross the street? Now I come from New York so I know what traffic looks like, but here we have traffic lights and everything.
He said "Oh No Problem Chap" and he lifts his cane and drags me into the street. I covered my eyes and got ready to scream in pain as we walked. I opened my eyes and noticed that the cars were going around us, on the sidewalk, in front and in back of us. They didn't slow down, they just kind of barely missed us.
:eek:


We make it to the other side and the guy thanks me and walks off. Now I take out my map to see where I am.

Another blind guy comes over to me and he wants me to cross him back across the street. The same thing happens and now I am on the wrong side of the street looking for a blind guy to get be back to the other side.

There was a "Lighthouse" blind people school, or social club on the corner so everyone, but me was blind.
You can't make this stuff up.
 

Paul B

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Early this morning at 1:36 I heard this big noise. My wife went to the bathroom like most ladies do for some reason in the middle of the night and she fell. Pretty hard. She has a cane and it is clear acrylic and kind of heavy which made a really loud noise on the wood floor.

Of course It woke me up and I had to get out of bed and help her back into bed. She didn't seem to get hurt too bad which I am very grateful for. I cringe every time I hear a loud noise because she is falling more and more now.

Last week she also fell while I was holding her. We were walking into a winery and she fell on gravel where she got a huge black and blue. I generally fall coming out of a winery. :confused:

Last week I got her a walker that she uses when she is getting around, but doesn't use it in the middle of the night.

I think we may have to change that procedure.

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Humblefish

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I was standing in line at a food truck the other day, and a frail, older lady in front of me fell down. Nobody reacted (not even the people she was with), so I picked her up (she was light) and carried her to the nearest picnic table out of the sun. I think she only scrapped her leg, but it's just amazing how callous people are nowadays.
 

Paul B

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Dexter, the Murphy bed was shipped so it should be here soon. It was made in I think Utah, Arizona or somewhere near there so unless they are carrying it on their backs, It will arrive "maybe" next week.

I installed an outlet for the wall TV and gave away the rest of the furniture. Someone is coming today to pick up the carpet.
My wife wants a new carpet with a very low pile so she doesn't fall on it while exercising. A lot of her exercising is laying down so we need to cover the wood floor. I thought she wanted a mat like you have and I ever showed it to her. But she feels a carpet would be more comfortable to lay on.

I would also like to install some sort of pole. I don't pole dance any more like Humblefish but it would help her greatly for ballance. (She falls)

I don't want to make any holes in the new wood floor so I will have to design something. I have some ideas.
Stay Safe
 

DexterB

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Hi Paul. Yes I can see how carpet might be more comfortable. Luckily you have all your construction knowledge & experience. So you will be able to select the best carpet pad , etc. for her gym. She is very lucky to have you so you can customize her gym! You will figure out a bar. You are good at innovative solutions.

The flat screen TV will be nice! I know she is very adept/knowledgeable in fitness (Pilates etc.), so she can just enjoy any regular TV show as she works out. 🙂

I need more guidance/directions 😄. So sometimes I go to YouTube to access free workouts/classes to help me out. Other times I watch a show my husband would find boring or too “chick-flick’ oriented.

Anyway it will be interesting to hear more about it as it progresses. Home gyms are going to be a real movement with today’s environment. Not just Covid, but the unrest in cities, gym closures etc. You should blog about it😄.

Have a nice Sunday!
 

Paul B

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Dexter, she also does the You Tube exercise things. Of course I would blow my brains out if I had to do those which is why I go down the 176 steps to the beach 6:00am in the morning. Thats my exercise. :cool:
 

DexterB

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I have seen photos of those steps Paul! They are intimidating. That is an intense workout.

My husband & I have seen thriller movies where the main character lives by the beach. In the middle of the movie, she is fleeing from the mystery psycho killer towards safety to the house,, on steps like those. We would always joke that if the psycho didn't kill her those steps could!😬
 

GoodVybes

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After all this working from home stuff, I realized my computer monitor needed to be raised up about 1/2" to be at the perfect height. Searched Amazon and found the perfect solution!

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Thanks @Paul B ! Kidding aside, I look forward to reading your book. I really enjoy following your posts, fish related or not! Some of my favorites are just the ones you post about your walks. For just a few minutes, I can pretend I'm smelling the rotting foxes right there with you!
 
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Paul B

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This morning we went to Walmart, and I never go to Walmart. There is one close by and I think I was there twice, counting today. I needed 9 gallons of boat antifreeze and they have it for like $2.50. Home Depot charges $5.00.

While we were there my wife saw this elliptical machine which normally sells for like 4 or 5 hundred bucks and they had it for $150.00 which is stupid cheap.

I tried to buy it but it was chained to the rack and the thing is like 200lbs so I needed help. Of course no one works there and the few people who do work there have no idea what I was talking about.
The thought of buying something that was chained to a rack was totally foreign to them and they didn't know how to call anyone who knew how to unchain this thing.

Now I know why I never go to Walmart.
On our way out, with just the antifreeze I saw they had a "Customer Care" counter so I stopped there. They actually had someone standing there and she was a Supermodel. I wanted to ask her why such a beautiful and apparently intelligent person would work there for probably minimum wage, but I didn't.

She said she could find someone to go there and un chain the machine but I declined because I figured it would be a big waste of time
 

Paul B

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This morning like most days I got up and took a walk outside to watch the sunrise and nature in general. Today I surprisingly didn't see any deer, woodchucks, Muskrat Sally's, hawks, peacocks, supermodels or road kill.

A school bus did stop near me at about 6:15 which I thought was a little early for kids to go to school. I think when I went to school it started at about 8:00 but we didn't really have any clocks in my one room school house so I am not sure.

As I walked, the first thing I came across was this "Deer Crossing" sign and I rushed past that because I didn't want to get hit by any deer at that time in the morning.

deer sign.jpg

There also wasn't any mist hanging over the grass like there usually is. It was quieter than normal and totally beautiful. I was wishing my wife could have come along but then in all that quiet she would have said something like:

"You know today you should really paint the front door, figure out what we are doing with the spare bedroom, go buy the paint for the hall way, call the car dealer because I want a new car as soon as they come out, see if our accountant can come over for dinner, ask our Daughter what the plans are for Thanksgiving etc.".

And that would be the end of the peacefullness.

I knew I was getting near the end of the road from the smell of wet horse. This is an affluent neighborhood and you can tell if you look close and pay attention. One thing that stood out is that the horses wear designer boots.
horse.jpg


So I walked about a mile and a half to the end of the country road where it ends at a larger road. At that junction there is this windmill. It’s a silly place for a windmill and I am sure it was someplace else a hundred and fifty years ago. The thing is there because there is a catering hall nearby and brides go there to take pictures. They have to be quick because as you can see it is totally falling apart and if any actual wind hit it, it would collapse into a large pile of termite infested sticks.
windmill.jpg


I don't see the attraction of taking a wedding picture in front of a defunct, dilapidated excuse for a windmill unless maybe the Happy couple want to try to convince people they had a destination wedding in Holland.

I am sure Holland has much better windmills so the people there most likely take pictures in font of Starbucks.

Behind the windmill is a dirt road which I have never been on so I went that way. It led to this "shed" which seems to have been built at the same time as the windmill by Columbus. I went in being careful the roof didn't collapse and I listened closely to make sure Otis the town drunk wasn't living in it.

shed.jpg

The only things in it were ancient lawn mowers in varying degrees of rusting into the ground. I looked around for something to use for a steam punk project with no luck so I left as the place was making me itchy.

I bet not long ago someone went in there and something scared him out of his underwear. No, really! I saw someone's underwear stuck in a tree and for that to happen, you really have to be running pretty fast.

underwear.jpg

I don't know what scared him but I wouldn’t know how to describe how my underwear ended up in a tree so I got away from there.

About two thirds of my way home, there was dense brush on both sides of me. To dense for anyone or anything to get through. But a sort of clearing opened up where I could see back into the thicket.
thicket.jpg


I didn’t want to get too close as the sun wasn’t really up yet and I didn’t notice any underwear in the trees but all of a sudden, out of the quietness I heard this very low, very close rumbling. Exactly like a lion sounds just before he pounces on the gazelle on the African Savanna, ripping it to pieces before swallowing it alive, not that I have ever been on the African savanna or saw a gazelle being eaten alive but I do watch David Attenbury describe it on National Geographic TV.

A thousand thoughts went through my head like how many lions are on Long Island New York? Not many I thought and the nearest lion was probably in the Bronx Zoo 100 miles away.

But maybe it was a pet that got away. Maybe it escaped from the Bronx Zoo and walked the hundred miles along the expressway undetected.

I wasn’t sure what it was but it sure sounded like the low rumble of a lion. A very big, very hungry lion.

I heard it again and I started walking faster, much faster. Almost running now and at my age, running doesn’t mean going so fast that bugs get caught in my teeth.

Then, all of a sudden, I heard the unmistakable sound of a tractor trailer horn. It was the diesel engine of the truck echoing through the brush and I assume the driver had it in the wrong gear.

OMG was I relieved.
 

Paul B

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I slept in our spare room last night as we are waiting for the Murphy bed to arrive so there is only a mattress on the floor and not much else in there.

My wife was in quite a bit of pain last night so I went in there to sleep. This morning, very early I heard her get up and I wanted to "rush" in there to see if she was OK.

She was, but I didn't realize I was on the floor so when I tried to "jump" out of bed, I just rolled across the floor into the wall which is unnerving at 6:00 in the pitch dark. :(
 
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